Suspicious

I generally don’t watch SNL. In fact, this week's show (5/8) might be the first episode I’ve seen in full. One skit stood out to me, correction, one exchange.

MEYERS - "Times Square was evacuated for the second time in a week on Thursday to investigate a threatening looking package that turned out to be a harmless cooler full of water. It was one of four NYPD trips to Midtown prompted by calls reporting suspicious behavior… Really? We have to call in suspicious looking behavior in Times Square? Have you ever been to Times Square? It’s where “suspicious” goes to hang out! Really."

POEHLER - "And really, which thing would they like me to report? There’s steam coming out the street. Out of towners taking pictures of landmarks. And 15 people are pedaling by on an alien super bike. I mean really?"

It got me thinking about all the strange things that you see here in the City. Some of my favorite harmless but out-of-the-ordinary people, in no particular order:

1) The guy with the cat on his head. He’s trained his cat to sit on top of his head as he wanders around the city.

2) The guy with the taxidermy dog that he pulls around on a leash and wheels.

3) The evangelist who decided that “Jesus can’t be the messiah. I’ll tell you why… Because Jesus… in Spanish… is “pronounced Hay Zoos… Don’t you get it?... As in ‘Hey Zeus, how ya doing’… I’ve done a lot of research on this.” In addition Christmas, Easter, and Halloween are the mark of the beast and Lucifer is female.

4) The guy who sings in his underwear and makes over $100K a year doing so. (Naked Cowboy)

5) The guy who sings opera under a bridge in Central Park while dancing in a loincloth and playing the violin. (Thoth)

6) The thousands of people that participate in the pantless subway ride in the middle of winter every year. I might participate if I wasn’t worried about running into a client or a co-worker. Pity growing old and mature.

7) The subway magician complete with live bird. If that thing ever gets away from him I think I’ll be screaming along with everyone else.

Fellow New Yorkers feel free to add to the list.


Note: My sister and I walked past the van earlier that evening. I don't remember seeing it and we were well past it before the cops cleared the streets. Still crazy.