Driving

Now that I have adjusted to most things in my new home country, I've realized that I slipped back into the state of not seeing adventure in the little things of life. For example, a recent adventure was learning to drive on the other side of the road.

My new job... have I mentioned yet that I got a new job about 5 weeks ago? Probably not. It makes my fifth job in a year. I won't say much about it in a public forum for a blog but suffice to say it is a challenging position, they want to sponsor me (!!!) and they gave me a car.

Driving over here wasn't as difficult as I imagined. I think this is partly due to not having driven frequently for years in NYC. Shifting gears with my left hand, not a problem. Making sure my right turns were wide, not a problem. Going though roundabouts, not a problem. But the turn signal being on the right hand side as created a world of difficulty. I go to show I am making a left and turn and my windshield wipers go full on. Why this action more than any of the others refuses to change in the long term memory, I am not sure. But I do find it amusing on my commute home.

The funniest part is, eight months of living here and in my head I picture it as it is here. I tried to explain the road rules of the States and I couldn't fully describe them. It is similar to what I think other people feel the first time they dream in their new language, the excited starting to belong in the new place and culture.

Hawaii

For Christmas this year I got the best present: A trip to Hawaii to see my family! There were a lot of memorable moments and laughter whether we were hiking, eating, competing at an inside joke game, or just hanging at the hotel. Hawaii is a beautiful state and we spent a lot of time wandering around to the different beaches hidden among the lava rocks. Some of my favorite moments:

Horseback riding: All of our horses behaved a bit like children with babysitters. Drifter, my little pony, did not want to stay close enough to my sisters horse although he was very responsive to any other lead. My brothers horse did a sneak attack on a banana tree. My sisters horse was ready to walk the track and did not want to wait for the rest of the crowd. Anyone that has worked with horses will tell you that they are distinct individuals. We also learned a lot about the history of Maui while riding into the valley.

Snorkeling: We traveled to Molokini Crater, a submerged volcano previously used for target practice by the navy. Now it shelters numerous fish and coral. Even my dad came out snorkeling even though he is terrified of swimming. My siblings and I got to go Snuba diving where you breath through a regulator while the air tank is on a raft. Rob ruptured his eardrum while snorkeling and so had a hard time with the Snuba. We saw a few turtles and heard the whales singing.

Road to Hana: We took the road years ago on my first trip to Hawaii and I had been very disappointed. The trees were overgrown so there were no good views. However, other people must have agreed with me because this year there were multiple areas where the trees had been trimmed offering beautiful snapshots. The real treasure of the road to Hana is off the actual road. We went to a black sand beach and climbed through and on a lava tube.

Whale Watching: We had ocean facing balconies so got to watch whales while relaxing. The whales migrate to Hawaii in the northern hemisphere's winter so there were a lot of them. Every time they showed up the whole breach froze to watch. For the first time I saw a whale breach.

Tradition

Traditions keep us grounded, connecting us to happy memories and people we love. The holiday season is normally filled with customs. This year being across the the world means none of my normal traditions have happened. As I plan to stay in Australia for at least another couple of years, it will be interesting to see if some of the things I've done this year will become my new holiday traditions.

New Years: As a teenager I always went to my friend LC's house with another friend AC (now AVB). New Years was a special time where we could catch up, hang out in the hot tub even in the snow, eat raw brownie mix and frosting, and dance around to 'You Don't Own Me'. We did the same thing for nine years. Like all good traditions, it was a way to create the familiar no matter what else was happening in our lives. Boys changed, what we did earlier in the night changed, schools changed, our relationship with our family changed, we were teenagers after all, but New Years was our night. Eventually, we changed. AC got married and the three of us moved to different cities. I never found a New Years Eve tradition to replace those times with the girls. Every year since then has been something and somewhere different. This year I will be with my family is Hawaii, almost the last place in the world to hit midnight.

Easter: I always found Easter to be a more relaxed holiday, maybe because I never did the cooking. In the morning we would look for our Easter baskets, which I still do if I am visiting my family. We would dye eggs making way too many. We would attend church and then have a bunch of people over to eat at our house, including some international students whom my mom invited over to experience a typical American holiday. The younger children would search for Easter eggs hidden in the yard that were filled with candy and money. I do not know what I will do this year.

July 4th: As children, we would go to my grandparent's plot of land. All of the extended family would be there plus family friends and people I had never met before. When we were little we used to take rides in the back of the lawnmover and destroy multiple kickballs when they were kicked into the rose bushes. As we got older we participated in volleyball, crochet, bean bag toss, lawn golf, and horseshoes. I'm sure it will come as no surprise I come from a fairly competitive family. At night we would watch fireworks singing patriotic songs. This year I ran around Sydney chasing a person in a duck costume.

Halloween: I didn't celebrate Halloween as a child. I went trick or treating once as an adult as a pirate although nobody could tell under all the winter gear I had to wear in Buffalo. Anytime I need a quick costume I tend to be a pirate. When I lived in NYC I would go to my friends M+K's house for a murder mystery night. Last year I got killed off three times. This year I went to a Halloween party again as a pirate.

Thanksgiving: For a few years after my family moved to New York, we would travel back to Ohio to see the extended family. We would have a huge thanksgiving dinner and play a lot of games. The next morning my uncles would cook breakfast and we would celebrate Christmas, exchanging gifts while the whole family was in town. We stopped going back to Ohio as we grew older and schedules got more difficult to arrange. Instead we went to a Thanksgiving Eve service and then my group of friends would go out to eat or dancing. On Thanksgiving my mom would host a large group of family friends. The next morning mom and I would head out in the early hours of the morning to take advantage of Black Friday sales. While I lived in NYC, I got to host Thanksgiving and we went to see the Macy's day parade. This year I went out to dinner with friends who were gracious enough to humor me when I asked them to go around the table and say something they were thankful for. The next morning I skyped my family and was a floating head in a laptop at the table. On Black Friday, I went to the American expat pot luck under the Harbour Bridge.

Christmas: Growing up I never believed in Santa Claus, a fact I used as a bragging point in grade school. On Christmas Eve my brother and I would go last minute Christmas shopping and out to eat. While I usually had almost all of my gifts, I would purposely leave at least one more to get to have the chance to hang out just the two of us. There was a Christmas Eve candlelight service at church where after the carols were sung my family would cause trouble by trying to blow each others candles out in a 'King of the Mountain' type face off. We would watch a couple of Christmas movies and head to bed. In the early hours of Christmas morning, 4:30am one year, my sister and I would sneak downstairs and exchange our gifts to each other by the light of the tree. My brother would join us and we would empty our stockings and watch 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas'. We would wait until the required time of 7:30 before waking our parents in creative although usually obnoxious ways. Now that I am older I realize they were already awake but did their bit to keep the tradition by not coming out of their room until we 'woke' them. We would open presents and mom would cook us breakfast, getting too little appreciation for the full buffet she presented. Dad would go through all the wrapping paper to make sure any little pieces were not lost. We would play with our toys, even toys we got as adults. This year I will spend Christmas on the beach with other holiday orphans then fly over to Hawaii to see my family for the first time in six months. By crossing the international date line, I get 48 hours of Christmas on the beach with family and friends.

While the actual event has changed throughout the year, as have the participants, the true traditions, and the purpose behind them, is to connect with those whom you love and who love you.

I wish you a Christmas filled with wonderful traditions and the creation of new memories.

Full-on

October and November have been full on, a grateful change from August where I was just working as a waitress every night. The weather is leading into summer but still ranges from 18 to the perfect 26 to 34 degrees. Yes, I talk in Celsius now. And kg. Although I still mix up writing dates, looking the right way before crossing the street, and understanding km and cm conversions. Some of the best moments:

1) NaNoWriMo- I finished a 50K book. Granted, nobody will be allowed to read it... possibly ever. It is tragically bad but there are some glimmers of purpose and promise starting to show. I have a greater understanding of what it takes to write a book and a much higher respect for authors, even authors with crap books. It is tough!

2) TESOL- I have started taking an online TESOL certification course. I have no idea where it will lead. So far I have learned what it means to be a good teacher and that, like most Americans, I have no idea about proper English grammar.

3) Sculpture by the Sea- Over 100 sculptures were placed along the cliffs between Bondi and Coodiee beach. It made for a gorgeous backgroup to some beautiful pieces.

4) The Races- Went to see the horses race at Ranwick Race Course. Won once. I felt sophisticated and European in my fascinator and couldn't help thinking of My Fair Lady throughout the day.

5) One of my friends works at the Sydney Opera House and she has given me tickets to a couple of shows. One had an intense story line, one was a classical opera, and one was based on "Of Mice and Men" I learned that I prefer the more classical Italian operas.

6) Thanksgiving- The American Expat group hosted a pot luck Thanksgiving dinner, under the Harbour Bridge, in the rain. An interesting side note: Most Aussies I have talked to think Thanksgiving is a bigger holiday than Christmas in America. I can say that in my brief pole of fellow Americans no one has agreed with this. Interesting how cultural mentalities are misunderstood. However, when I watch tv (where most ideas of America are grounded) every sitcom has a Thanksgiving episode and far fewer have Christmas episodes so it is understandable.

This is the longest that I have been away from my family and I miss them terribly. I always went home for Thanksgiving and Christmas and it has been a tradition for years to go shopping with my mom on Black Friday. My little sister is now engaged, my little brother is getting ready to graduate college. In exactly 19 days (maybe 18 since I cross the international date line) I will get to see my family. :D That smile isn't big enough.

7) Organized a hike to the "Grand Canyons" of Australia, the Blue Mountains with 44 people. I miss the Fall with the leaves changing color, the pumpkin carving, and the corn mazes, but at least there is still hiking here.

8) Went Paddleboarding. At first our legs were shaking but almost everyone got the hang of it by the end. There were surprisingly few oar fights.

9) Organized a scavenger hunt around Sydney. I got to wander around the city looking for places for the teams to find. I enjoyed creating the event and working out all the details. There were 39 contestants and even in the rain it seemed like the teams had fun. Plus as judges we got to make them do funny things wheelbarrow races in a very public place.

10) Moved Apartments. I was living with 9 other people in a 2 bedroom flat. We had nationalities from all over the globe. Even with my extroverted nature I am surprised I lasted as long as I did. That makes 4 jobs and 3 apartments in 5 months for those keeping track.

11) Met with some people about sponsored jobs. There isn't a lot more to say about that yet because I am still trying to figure out this part of the transition.

December is already filling up with Chrissy parties, optimistically more stability, and Hawaii with my family!

Novel

"Let's go on dreaming, though we know we are." ~'So Close' from Enchanted

November is National Novel Writing Month. NaNoWriMo is an online community of prospective authors who try to write a complete novel from scratch during the month of November. I will be joining them, along with my friend AM and my mom. I have a basic idea of some of the characters and some thoughts on the plot running around in my head. No official outline yet but I'll see what comes out.

I wrote stories all the time as a child. Some where dark like a murder mystery based on the 13 Dead End Drive board game. Others were light and happy as in the case of Tommy the Go-Cart. Then the desire got lost. Correction, I ignored it. In college I started comparing myself to friends who also loved to write. I saw and envied the way they captured normal moments with a descriptive flare. I didn't form complexly worded sentences or tap into the depth of the tortured artist. So I thought I couldn't be a writer; that is was just a childish dream.

But then I started this blog and realized that while I don't write in a style suitable for the classics such as Les Mis or Rebecca, I have a style all my own; a style which captures my optimistic nature, mimics the way my brain thinks complete with topic jumps, and an easy style that people can relate to. Though I guess since I am starting my TESOL certification (Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages) I should change that last phrase to "and an easy style to which people can relate." My blog has brought back my love of writing as a way of storytelling, and the old dream of being a writer.

As the goal is 50,000 words in a month this will be my only blog entry for November. Every word written here is one not written in my novel. Being an author is still a childish dream and I'm thankful it is. All the best dreams are made when we are children and don't understand limitations.

SCUBA

SCUBA is short for self-contained underwater breathing apparatus. I've wanted to get certified since my sister and I went snuba diving with the sea turtles in Hawaii years ago. Snuba is similar to scuba in that you are completely submerged but the air tank is on a raft on the surface instead of on your back.

I'm getting my PADI certification with True Blue Dives over three Thursdays at the local beaches in the eastern suburbs.

Dive #1: A snorkel dive just to get (re)acquainted with the concept of breathing while your face is in the water.

Biggest Challenge: Relaxing when breathing.

My brain goes into the annoying, although appropriate, habit of trying to not let me die. Breathing in while your face is underwater goes against that idea logically. I could hear each ragged breath. The first breath was a timid trial and the second actually brought air to my lungs.

Scariest Moment: Swimming next to jellyfish.

First they are difficult to see unless you are right next to them. Second they have translucent trailing pieces that can hurt you. My Australian friends love talking about all the things that can kill you in this country but in a calm relaxed manner. In fact, I bring up box jellies or snakes purposely just to see their faces light up with pride. I'm adding the jellyfish lake to my list of places I want to visit. Nothing like facing your fears to help move past them.

Most Enjoyable Moment: Realizing how much easier it is to swim with flippers.

Dive #2: Scuba Intro Unlike other scuba certification classes, True Blue Dive takes you right into the ocean, no pool time.

Lesson #1: How to assemble all the pieces of the equipment and how to carry 70 pounds on your back to the shore.

Lesson #2: Hand signals.

Lesson #3: How to clear our goggles and regulator while submerged.

Lesson #4: How to move up and down without relying on the BCD. The buoyancy control device is a fancy vest attached to the air tank that can fill or deflate.

Scariest Moment: The first breath after clearing the regulator while submerged.

After a bit, my brain almost ignored the "Don't breath underwater" rule. But after taking the regulator out of my mouth, letting it fill with water, putting it back in my mouth, and clearing it, my brain reinstated the rule. Each and every time.

Funniest Moment: Getting into the ocean

We had to get our flippers on while standing in ankle deep water (knee deep when the waves hit) while also balancing on rocks with 70 pounds on our backs and then make it past the submerged rocks that kept coming out of nowhere and into the open ocean. I got stuck on more than a few rocks. Ocean +6 Jen +1. I gave myself a point since I did technically make it to the ocean even though my execution was a bit awkward.

Most Enjoyable Moment: Petting a shark.

Some might think that this would be the scariest moment but he was only about three feet long and I stayed away from the teeth. Then we followed him to an overhang where there were four more larger sharks just hanging out. They eat shells not people so as long as our fingers didn't end up in their mouths it was okay. Sharks are coarse like sandpaper not slimy like fish. And I'll admit the fact that I'm more scared of jellyfish than sharks is a bit odd.

At this point I don't think Scuba will be an obsession but check back with me after dive #6. I want to get certified so I can go to the Great Barrier Reef with some friends. Plus, no matter where I am in the world, when the desire to scuba hits me on a whim, I can just go.

Walkabout

A walkabout is an Australian rite of passage for Aboriginal men. It may originially have just been a trip across the Outback for boring reasons such as business meetings but it has come to be viewed as a spiritual trek. When you go out into one of the most unforgiving environments on the planet, it becomes spiritual.

The concept of the walkabout remains in Australian culture. Teenagers and young adults are encouraged to travel, to "walk about" the world before they come back to Oz. The term 'gap-year' is used quite frequently, and while not a strickly Australian concept, it is something that is looked upon favorably here.

There is something about this country that stays with you. Everyone I spoke to about Australia before moving here said they wanted to spend more time here or wanted to come back for another visit. Two of my friends who did a wilderness excursion into the outback with NOLS, talk about it fondly, like it happened only last year. It is a country that leaves it mark on your heart. Yes, that might seem a bit melodramatic, but if you've ever been here... you know.

I'm on my own walkabout. I have no idea where I will be in a year or what path to take. There are still so many options that I am stuck in a Paradox of Choice. I can't figure out what ice cream flavor I want much less figure out my future. And this too is part of the process. I've come to realize that intentionally creating my life applies in spite of the uncertainty, now more than ever.

The topic of failure has come up a lot in conversations, blogs I follow, and the constant whirl of thoughts in my head. As a generation we don't know how to fail. Everyone gets trophies in sports; teachers can't write in red pen.

But real self esteem comes from knowing when (not if) you fall on your face, you have the strength to get back up and try again. In those moments it's about whether I give up or get up. I'm learning when to quit things that aren't good for me and when to persevere. I'm learning how to balance the desire for financial security with the motivation to fully experience this country. Years from now, no matter where I end up, I'll be sharing stories from my walkabout.